I have failed to sustain the meditation habit in past. It is interesting to note that I have restarted the practice each time I have quit. Sometimes there were gaps of multiple years. Till now, I cannot say that I have greatly benefitted from meditation.
Ironically, during times of turmoil, I felt that meditation is useless and discontinued. It is ironic as meditation is supposed to support one, precisely during the turbulent times. Somewhere deep inside(let me call it samskar), I do believe that the discontinuity happened because of my lack of practice and not because of some inherent flaw in meditation. Samskar tells me that if I am more regular with meditation, it will indeed support me during times of trouble. Hence I come back to it again and again. It is not all inner-voice and samskar though. There have been periodic articles in magazines extolling the virtues of meditation.
So here I am, back at meditation, possibly seventh time around.
PS: I have assumed samskar and gut-feel to mean the same thing.
(To be continued)